A journey
The Big question: What is life? How will you define it? Is
it total amount of time you have?
For me it is like a tunnel. We begin our
journey empty handed; we learn to navigate the tunnels as we move on. There are
many dangers, hurdles and exciting adventures waiting to be explored. The path we
tread on will be treacherous and dangerous. Sometimes it will be dark and
sometimes it will be bright. But, eventually, like it or not we all reach the
end of the tunnel.
Let me ask you another question: Do you have what it takes
to navigate, protecting yourself and your loved ones, through these unknown
lands? Become a beacon of light in the impeding darkness when it befalls your
family, trying to procure a better, a safer path? For those of you, who are
just beginning your journey, I have couple of leaflets, some directions that
might help to secure a safer passage
1. Don’t look back
Why? Why cant i look back? Would i be turned to stone?
You can look back all you want. But
ask yourself. Can you change it? Can you do something about it? No you cannot,
if not, then what’s the point, all you can do is to learn from it and move on.
Remember “every saint has a past”.
We all stumble at some points of our lives. The trick is to never stop walking,
get a grip, pull yourself up, dust yourself and keep moving forward.
Do you know the best way to escape hell? It’s to keep walking. Remember “it’s all right to look back and learn from your mistakes but don’t dwell on it, do not linger. Keep moving.”
2. The Present
Do I live in my present?
Always remember “past is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a present”
Know and realize that your preset
is more important than past and even the future. It is just like a present, so that
you may shape your future. With the right tools and resources the present
becomes a blank check.
Do not dwell on how you will manage. Just do your best and live your life to its fullest. A wise man once told me "Try to live your life in day tight compartments". Don’t worry about tomorrow just live in the present.
3. Fear of failure
What is failure? What am I really
afraid of?
Failure is a matter of
perspective. It is that fear of failure that keeps us from trying, holding us
back and impeding our success. But the wonderful thing about failure is how you
to choose to look at it. For some it will be the end of the world, for others
it will just be like a stepping stone. We always have a choice.
We only fear the unknown. It’s
like a monster in our closet. So why not face it? I know it’s easier said than
done but when you face it, it will be gone.
Let run a diagnosis. Ask yourself:
What am I really afraid of? What are the demons that haunt me?
Have you ever noticed that you
always feel threatened at crucial development of your life? It is those turning
points of your life that you admit to yourselves, are bigger than you are. In
this case it’s the fear.
You can be paralyzed and do
nothing or you can face it and change your life forever. As I said before it’s
your choice. It’s all a matter of perspective. But if you choose to stand and
fight then you need to look at it more objectively.
Step back and ask yourself "What am I really afraid of?"
Keep on thinking and find the big
bad wolf that keeps haunting you in your dreams:
- I am afraid that I won’t get accepted in college
- I am afraid that I won’t pass the exams
- I am afraid that I won’t procure enough funds
Okay that’s better, now you have
pinned down your fear in to a concrete actual objective. Once you understand
why and what you are afraid of, you can devise a plan and tackle your problems,
systematically.
4. Stop comparing
Do I compare myself?
We always want to see how far we
have gone, how much we have gained and for that we need some sort of a
reference. Like when you are telling someone directions. You usually say it’s
this far from here or form there. So you always have a reference point. In this
regard, it is completely normal to compare yourself with others, but it comes
at a great cost. Whatever the reason, you should never compare yourself with
others.
Why should I stop comparing? What are its demerits?
When you compare, it can only have
one of the two possible outcomes. You can either be happy resulting in a boost
to your self-esteem and feeding your ego or the results can land a serious fatal
blow to your self-confidence. The first case scenario you will become overconfident
and look down on people, which is not desirable trait in a person, and in the
second case you will impede your own success due to low self esteem.
How can I stop?
Remember as Eleanor Roosevelt said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"
Whenever you find yourself in this
predicament. Don’t beat or demoralize yourself. It’s completely normal. Tell
yourself to STOP THAT and gently shift your focus on your strengths rather than
your weakness. Learn to see and appreciate what you have in life.
5. Do not try to please everyone
Am i trying to please everyone?
It is one of the most important things
to look out for. You need to ask yourself if you are one of those who ask themselves
these questions
- What will people say if I ……………………
- What will they think if I …………
- What will he/she say/think if I …………………
Remember “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind”
I am not asking you to be disrespect or disregard anyone, but to speak your mind. Stop trying to please everyone. There are countless number of people on planet each having a unique fingerprint, a unique face and voice. Likely they also have their own ideals, motives and own thoughts. So, you can’t possibly please everyone. It is impossible. Just STOP IT. Live your life to its fullest. Listen and respond in gentle. Do not disrespect or disregard anyone and stay true to your goals. Remember “Always keep your eyes on the prize.”
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